Stop living in a Weight Loss Mindset
Aug 07, 2020The moment you stop living in a weight loss mindset – the easier weight loss actually becomes.
I’ve been feeling really beautiful lately. I just feel so good within my skin. We aren’t supposed to speak about ourselves like that, are we?
Tell a toddler they are incredible and they will smile and say – thank you, I know!
But as we age, somewhere along the way we start to disregard the compliments we get – and worse, we start to forget how incredible we are when we look in the mirror.
When was it that you started to pick yourself apart?
Can you even remember when that started?
What would it take for you to stop?
If you could see me now you would be confused! I am in no way beautiful by conventional standards. I’m in a mis matched tracksuit – my hair is in a top knot, my cheeks are flushed from a workout I just did – but still I feel truly beautiful this morning.
I’m living my passion. I feel grounded in my purpose as a wife and a mother and compelled to share myself with my community. I validate my own existence daily. I’m happy to be me and loving the experience of discovering daily what it really means to be me. It’s a beautiful feeling – and because of that, I feel beautiful.
A lot of people I talk to think that their sense of self worth would improve if they could just lose some damn weight.
I hear it all the time – If the number on the scale would only go down then I would…
Have more confidence
Start to feel better about myself
Be more likely to look myself in the eye when I stand in front of the mirror
If the number on the scale would only go down I would…
Enjoy shopping
Take my kids to the beach more often
Instigate intimacy with my partner
But friends – it’s just simply not true.
Losing weight may be necessary for your health & it may make movement easier. It might very well be what our society makes us believe we should be thinking about as we plan our meals and move our bodies, but let me tell you this – it’s been my experience that self worth has no direct correlation to the number that somebody sees on the scales .
I’ve seen countless people strive to reach a goal weight and experience success – and Ive also witnessed the way in which their level of personal satisfaction, fulfilment and happiness did not improve in the slightest. In fact, more often than not, as their weight decreased, so did their vibrance, energy and vitality.
Losing weight is not a bad thing.
In fact, when done right it’s actually fun.
It’s liberating to realise that you are in control of your health and your body.
But if weight loss is consuming your mind, ruling your emotions, dictating the way in which you feel about yourself – then you are actually not in a good position to continue your weight loss journey.
Doubling down on weight loss will not help you lose more weight.
It will create an unhealthy obsession and suck the life out of you.
I look back at photos of myself in my mid twenties and I’m in awe of the physique I see. Having said that, the truth is that my reflection was never enough to fulfil me.
In my mid twenties I was in a marriage that was struggling, a career that was sucking the life out of me and I was repressing deep desires and needs.
My body was the one thing I could control in a life that felt so out of control – so I found comfort in the gym. It gave me a sense of personal power to watch my body respond and reflect my efforts.
It never made me happy.
My weight was not the determining factor for happiness.
Life began to feel lighter when I dropped the weight of the expectations of society and turned inward to discover a new ‘normal’.
Spending time creating a journaling system to capture my daily thought download allowed me to clear my mind, sift through my thoughts and consciously choose the thinking that would generate the emotions I wanted to feel throughout the day – and in my life.
I’m yet to meet a single person who can attribute their own happiness and fulfilment to the number they see when they stand on their bathroom scales.
Maybe this reflection was meant for you. Maybe you needed to be given permission to stop focusing on weight loss and start focusing on being healthy.
The irony is, when you truly do shift your focus from weight loss to your health and wellbeing – the weight loss becomes easy and effortless & begins to take care of itself.
If like me, and most of the world, your usual routines have been axed – use this time to go and fall in love with living a healthy lifestyle.
Because friends – lets remember, the scale just reflects a numerical value between your relationship with gravity.
That’s it. Nothing more, nothing less.
Your happiness, self worth, how capable you are – it can never be measured numerically.
I’m often asked how I find the motivation to exercise day after day, month after month, year after year. If you have seen be generating energy to show up and share workouts online day after day – you might have asked yourself the same thing!
I’ve reflected on this question and it is because I am encouraged by the deep love and appreciation I have for my body.
Exercise to me Is more than uncovering what I can lift or how far I can run – it’s accepting and loving my body for everything that it is right now.
I can continue day after day because I don’t ever feel like I’m giving it 110% and then being disappointed by the results of my efforts.
Every day – whatever I have to give is enough.
I don’t ‘expect’ anything from myself on any given day. Im not holding myself to standards or continuously pushing myself to reach better benchmarks. I have deep compassion for myself.
One hour of Exercise will reveal how you have spent the other 23 hours of your day. If you treat your body like rubbish – you’ll feel it when you ask it to perform for you.
So unless you are under medical instruction to lose weight hear me when I say this : you don’t need to go on a strict diet. You don’t actually have to exercise obsessively. Your weight loss journey is as simple as moving and nourishing your body.
We work with our community to create nutrition and training plans because we believe in offering that support, we are supporting people in finding the freedom to spend their day focusing on the things that will really bring them to life. Taking care of your nutrition and exercise plan will then give you the space to turn your attention to other areas of your life!
Spend some time thinking about what you should be eating to nourish your body and how you can effectively and efficiently move your body. Then go ahead and do it imperfectly – but consistently.
The moment you stop living in a weight loss mindset – the easier weight loss actually becomes.
Whenever I said I wasn’t eating something I would binge on it! The moment I told myself I couldn’t have chocolate for the next 3 months was the exact moment that chocolate was all that I wanted.
I no longer live life at war with myself.
Rather than trying to work out what you need to eat and how many calories you should burn – begin by fine tuning your self awareness.
Ask yourself, what do I need right now?
What can I do to serve myself in this season?
Don’t worry about how you lost weight in the past.
The truth is – I’m not holding myself accountable to what I did 5 years ago. I’m not even accountable to what I did in January – this year has been a roller coaster.
Give yourself permission to meet yourself right where you are today.
Ask yourself – what is best for me in my body, my mind, my spirit?
The answer to that question is likely to be – move with joy, towards joy and nourish your body.
Find exercise you like and foods that will serve you well.
If what you are doing now feels heavy – if your struggle for weight loss feels like a losing battle – stop fighting.
Stop going to war with yourself. Start to be your own best friend.
If you would like support in building momentum and moving towards a life filled with positive affirmation around food and exercise – I invite you to stay connected with us.
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